If I make it through the day without crying it will be a miracle! I was so ready to just throw up my arms in defeat this morning. I don't want to punish Elijah by not letting him go to Bible School, but it's interfering so much with his sleep schedule...which interferes with his behavior. And I don't even think he realizes what's going on either.
This is the second time this week that he's told me he doesn't like me...wait, I think the third actually. Things probably wouldn't be too bad except I have my parents chiming in their two cents. My dad always gets on me about how I treat him, whether I'm being too hard on him or babying him too much. With my mom it's always Grammy to the rescue. She can do no wrong in his eyes and it's always her he runs to.
Today I was trying to care for Mikey because he woke up early and then it was time to get Elijah up. He told me he didn't want to stay in bed, but he wasn't getting out of bed either...how do I tackle that answer?! So I went to leave and he fussed, I came back to see what he wanted, he shrugged his shoulders, so I went to make Mikey's cereal.
THEN, as if all that wasn't enough I called Michael back. (He called last night while we were picking Elijah up from VBS. I told him I'd call him back because we had just gotten to the church. Things were crazy at home and I didn't get to call him.) He had the audacity to yell at me for not calling back because "it was important". Apparently, he was involved in an accident and is trying to make a quick buck I guess. He's obviously not that injured if he was released from the hospital the same night and is going about normal business today! (He doesn't have to pay anything by way of medical bills either because Medicaid pays for that!) He wants my mom's boss to represent him, like he has money for that. Go to legal aid, like you told me to do when I needed a lawyer!
It's so funny that now that we're not together, everything he said when we were together, now it's the complete opposite! We didn't have any money and I had to be the mooch to my friends and family (thank you to all who helped out) because he couldn't ask his family. They're all tightwads. Now he tells me that he's asking his family for all kinds of help and money. I guess he just didn't want to fess up to them that he was drinking how he was. I guess it was a real burden for him to take care of his family...instead of looking for a job, let's mooch off of others. Like it's everyone else's responsibility to care for us!
Sigh...like I really need his crap when I have so much more on my plate. Then he says to me that I took one of the movies I bought him. Actually I had bought it for both of us, that made it fair game. (It was the only "our" movie that I took.) Then I told him that it didn't matter who it was bought for anyway because when I bought him Shawshank Redemption he gave that away. Then he gets all hyper and tells me to stop bringing up the past. I told him that he needs to stop that because every time I bring something up it's not valid, but when he brings stuff up, it is valid. He didn't have anything to say about that.
I really have to get to the post office though and put in a change of address...mail is still going to the apartment and now that he's not there anymore...
And ya know, I felt bad about the whole accident thing...he calls me up and tells me how tragic this accident was and all I could think of was that he was over exaggerating, like he usually does. I mean, I do hope he's okay and all, but after all the drama and absolute crap he's put me through, I really don't care. I don't have the time or energy to be concerned with that. I have the 2 boys to take care of, myself to take care of, work, trying to register for classes in the fall, trying to get assistance for child care, trying to finalize paperwork for my case at Social Services...I mean, where am I supposed to fit Michael into my life?? Not to mention I don't really have any time set aside to do devotions or anything like that!
Like I said, if I make it through the day without crying it will be a miracle!
*SMILE*
Today I was trying to care for Mikey because he woke up early and then it was time to get Elijah up. He told me he didn't want to stay in bed, but he wasn't getting out of bed either...how do I tackle that answer?! So I went to leave and he fussed, I came back to see what he wanted, he shrugged his shoulders, so I went to make Mikey's cereal.
THEN, as if all that wasn't enough I called Michael back. (He called last night while we were picking Elijah up from VBS. I told him I'd call him back because we had just gotten to the church. Things were crazy at home and I didn't get to call him.) He had the audacity to yell at me for not calling back because "it was important". Apparently, he was involved in an accident and is trying to make a quick buck I guess. He's obviously not that injured if he was released from the hospital the same night and is going about normal business today! (He doesn't have to pay anything by way of medical bills either because Medicaid pays for that!) He wants my mom's boss to represent him, like he has money for that. Go to legal aid, like you told me to do when I needed a lawyer!
It's so funny that now that we're not together, everything he said when we were together, now it's the complete opposite! We didn't have any money and I had to be the mooch to my friends and family (thank you to all who helped out) because he couldn't ask his family. They're all tightwads. Now he tells me that he's asking his family for all kinds of help and money. I guess he just didn't want to fess up to them that he was drinking how he was. I guess it was a real burden for him to take care of his family...instead of looking for a job, let's mooch off of others. Like it's everyone else's responsibility to care for us!
Sigh...like I really need his crap when I have so much more on my plate. Then he says to me that I took one of the movies I bought him. Actually I had bought it for both of us, that made it fair game. (It was the only "our" movie that I took.) Then I told him that it didn't matter who it was bought for anyway because when I bought him Shawshank Redemption he gave that away. Then he gets all hyper and tells me to stop bringing up the past. I told him that he needs to stop that because every time I bring something up it's not valid, but when he brings stuff up, it is valid. He didn't have anything to say about that.
I really have to get to the post office though and put in a change of address...mail is still going to the apartment and now that he's not there anymore...
And ya know, I felt bad about the whole accident thing...he calls me up and tells me how tragic this accident was and all I could think of was that he was over exaggerating, like he usually does. I mean, I do hope he's okay and all, but after all the drama and absolute crap he's put me through, I really don't care. I don't have the time or energy to be concerned with that. I have the 2 boys to take care of, myself to take care of, work, trying to register for classes in the fall, trying to get assistance for child care, trying to finalize paperwork for my case at Social Services...I mean, where am I supposed to fit Michael into my life?? Not to mention I don't really have any time set aside to do devotions or anything like that!
Like I said, if I make it through the day without crying it will be a miracle!
*SMILE*
1 comment:
Oh hun, big (((hugs))) for you. Go cry if you need to! Hope you and the boys are OK, it takes time but you'll get there. Eli sounds as though he's in a right strop at the moment, don't worry it will pass soon (though maybe not as soon as you'd like lol)! Hope Mikey's tooth comes through soon, poor baba! You take care hun, and you have my e-mail addy if you need to rant. X
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